"The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances." - Martha Washington
How very wise and how very true? These are wise words spoken by the wife of the very first president of the United States.
Ponder her statement for a moment. We may not LIKE our current circumstances, but our attitudes and thought processes determine whether we will be miserable or not. My thought is that attitude and disposition accounts for not only how we currently feel, but how successful we are in life. We have the capability to mold our situation into whatever we want it to be, for the most part. I wish I had realized this when I was a very young adult.
To take this a step further, we have choices. We have the liberty to change our circumstances if we do not like them. It does require work and effort on our part, and if we CHOOSE not to do the work required, then we must garner some acceptance of our circumstances. It really is that simple.
If we know where we want to be in life, we must devise a road map to get us there and determine what work is required to help us arrive to our destination.
I'll give you an example from my own life and my own current circumstances. I work a 40 hour per week job in a medical office. For the most part, I enjoy my work. What I do not enjoy is many of the people I work with. There is a lot of cattiness, game playing, back-biting and a level of sabotage that goes on in the office I work for. There are also many negative people who go around cursing and complaining the entire day, EVERYDAY. At times it is very difficult to get through the day because I am forced to sit immediately next to and interact with one of the most negative people in the office. Now, most days I talk to myself to maintain a positive attitude and get through the day. What do I tell myself? I tell myself that my situation there is temporary, and it IS. I have a plan. My job is part of the plan to help me get where I want to be, frankly because I need a paycheck. Let's face it, like it or not, a girl's gotta pay bills. Additionally, I will need lenders to loan me money when I am ready to venture out on my own. So my current job is an avenue on my road to success. Complaining or not putting my best foot forward would only be self sabotage because it could potentially hamper my chances of getting the finances I will need in the future to build my own business. Constantly kicking myself if I make a mistake or something doesn't go quite the way I anticipated it would, will keep me discouraged and if I stayed in that thought process I would eventually be miserable enough to give up on mostly everything. Thus, keeping my eye on the prize in the end helps me to get through my current situation and keeps my level of happiness and positivity up and gives me what I need to make it through each day. Furthermore, I CHOOSE to have a good and positive attitude in a negative situation. My thought process keeps me separated from the negative things that go on around me every day. I keep my focus and I don't lose site of the prize. Can you see that?
Did you ever take a road trip to someplace really exciting when you were a kid? For me that was an amusement park in Sandusky, OH, called Cedar Point. Going to Cedar Point was the trip of a lifetime. I can remember sitting on the bus, looking out of the window at the landscape and thinking…"Are we ever going to get there?" My excitement level rose and fell as I took in the scenery and saw places that I thought might be it only to get close enough to see that we weren't there yet. I felt like the road trip was going to last forever and just when it seemed it would, I looked out of the window and saw the silhouettes of the rollercoasters and rides in the distance. I had arrived!
Life and my journey are much the same. I don’t always like the journey but I know that it's necessary and I also know what's at the end of my current map. I am convinced that I am going to make it to the "Amusement Park". And just like the bus driver, I have a road map to get me there. I know exactly where I'm going. I haven't arrived yet. I don't have the things in hand right now that I will have someday. But I'm working towards getting there. Just the thought of knowing that makes me happy and keeps me traveling.
Now, I realize that there are variables that we have no control over and that sometimes things change our circumstances e.g. death and disaster. Sometimes there are smaller things that change our circumstances but most of these changes are temporal. They may cause us to deviate from our road maps or force us to take a detour, but they don't have to be permanent unless we let them.
You are only as successful as you think you are. The power of thought and attitude should not be underestimated. If you think that you won't succeed at something, YOU ARE PROBABLY RIGHT because your thought process will not allow you to even try to change your circumstance.
If you live each day in misery, ask yourself why? Why am I miserable? What would make my life NOT miserable? How do I get there? What would be required for me to have happiness? Define what happiness and/or success means to you. Once you have determined that, decided if you want to do what is required to get there. If you are willing to step out on a limb and do the work, GO FOR IT and keep your eye on the prize. Be content and happy knowing where you are going and what you will become in the future. If you are NOT willing to do what is required, for whatever reasons you tell yourself, (usually based on fear of failure) then ACCEPT the fact that you are choosing your circumstance and settling for the fact that life is what it is for you and this is as good as it gets. Therefore, you should choose to be happy because this is the life that you have, so why live it in misery?
Either way; as Martha Washington so gracefully put it, go forth and know that:
"The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our DISPOSITIONS and not on our circumstances."
Dee Dee Walter
